It ain’t “both sides”.

A lot of what we say is so that we can sleep at night.
“God knows my heart.”
“I was just joking.”
“Your baby is so cute.” 

It’s all bullshit. God knows your heart and still deals with your ass so do better, you weren’t joking you just didn’t think you’d get called out and EVERY baby is NOT cute. But what else you gon say when you see an unfortunate looking baby “Yikes.”? Nah. It’s human nature. I do it. You do it. Though if the baby ain’t cute I just say, ‘you look just like yo daddy!’

As long as your bullshit isn’t affecting my life and vice versa, we’re good. But there is some bullshit that IS affecting my life and the culture, and since I’m an expert on calling out, here I am.

White people have “both side-ed” 100 years too long and we have to address it. The Unite the Right Rally, or the “Cintronella Circle-Jerk”  took place in Charlottesville, Virginia August 11th-12th, 2017. He-who-must-not-be-named, given yet another chance to be an actual leader failed miserably.  After neo-nazi James Fields, Jr.  drove his car into a crowd, killing Heather Heyer and injuring 35 others, the President of these United States said, “There’s blame on both sides…”; thus the “both sides” trend begun.

And my mind was (not really) blown.

If you punch me in the face, and I punch you back, there’s not blame on “both sides”.  The marginalized (POC, women, LGBT, etc.) reacting  to oppression cannot take as much custody of a conflict as an army of young white men chanting “Jews will not replace us.” The side that literally murdered someone cannot also have “fine people”.

These are the same people that ask a woman what she was wearing when she got raped, or that argue a child can seduce a grown ass man.

There were NO fine people on the ‘right’ in Charlottesville. Zero. None. Everyone who showed up for the Unite The Right Rally is a racist piece of shit. Period. Heather Heyer was not in the street  because it was a nice day outside. She was protesting white supremacy, which is a LIE that is always worthy of protest.

They are extreme though, right? Absolutely. I would argue though that “respectable” white people who (appear to be) a teench more reasonable than neo-nazis are also a huge part of the problem.

Meghan McCain is a good example of the respectable conservative white  who is ALSO a part of the problem. So we let them sit at the table, literally.  You won’t find them at neo-nazi marches (because they can’t wear their hoods) but you won’t find them speaking out against racism either. They are republican, after all.

The Meghans of this country benefit from a system founded in white supremacy so while they aren’t white supremacists on paper, (because they have some Black and Jewish friends) they aren’t really mad about white supremacy either and will even try to defend it in a ’round about way. That’s
why they are so passionate about ‘boarder control‘. God forbid a brown immigrant who is more qualified than Meghan get to enter this country because lets face it, the only reason we know Meghan McCain exists is because she’s a white woman named McCain.

The third white is the quiet one. They voted for Trump but won’t admit it and are strangely quiet around covert racism. They even may extend thoughts and prayers to victims of white supremacist motivated terrorists attacks and express that they long for the days when everyone could just get along on both sides of the aisle. They are delusional at best complacent at their worst.

When all levels of whiteness work in concert to take the blame off themselves, victim blame and be be silent they leave a quite the burden on minorities and white social justice warriors, people who are actually doing the work. But they have taken it a step farther.

White people always manage out white themselves.

Last week, leaked FBI documents from fiscal year 2018 indicated that “Black Identity Extremists” or BIEs and animal rights/environmental activists are at the top of their counterterrorism efforts and did not directly mention white supremacy at all.

Now, I have no warm and fuzzy feelings about cops on any level. But I didn’t think that EVERYbody in the FBI was a moron, so yall know I put my Googles to work. Apparently, the current white house didn’t want the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) to mention white supremacy in its report.

There is nothing new about white supremacy it is the foundation on which these United States are built. Don’t argue. What is new is a President (openly) in bed with white supremacy. White supremacy cannot be called out by a white supremacist.

This white house has cut the budget of the DHS’ domestic terrorism program from $21 million in 2017 to $2.6 million currently. Without a budget and  with pressure from the President to not target his base, there is no way for federal law enforcement to even investigate domestic terrorism much less prevent it.

In the past 2 years, white supremacists have been responsible for all race-related incidents. All of them. Every single one. You know who hasn’t? Black Lives Matter (BLM) & People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), cause that’s who they mean when they say Black Identity Extremists and Animal Rights Activists.

PETA and BLM have never gone in Walmart, a church/temple/mosque, a movie theater, night club, music festival or ANYWHERE with an AR-15 and killed dozens of people. White men have. Animal rights activists and social justice warriors don’t have political power. White men do.

BLM was created as a response to the murder of Trayvon Martin. In the same way George Zimmerman is responsible for his murder, white supremacy is responsible for terrorist attacks in El Paso, Dayton, Gilroy, Pittsburg, Louisville, San Diego, & Tallahassee.

And in the same way, George Zimmerman got off, white supremacy is getting off. Since Donald Trump has become President, 62 people have been killed and 79 have been injured in the name of white supremacy.

As long as presidential candidates and political commentators “don’t know what’s in his heart” when the POTUS calls Black/Brown countries, shitholes, Mexican immigrants rapists, calls Black women dogs, claims Black men who disagree with him have low IQ, demand to see a Black person’s birth certificate, and insist that white supremacists are ‘fine people’… the white supremacy will continue to feel emboldened and the danger will only get worse.

The police have stopped 6 white supremacist attacks since El Paso 2 weeks ago. 

It isn’t both sides, It is one side and one side only. It’s the white, cishet-male, Christian side.

It is the responsibility of that side to fix it. Until the we call a spade a spade, a duck a duck and white supremacy, terrorism, we remain in danger. Who is we? Black/Brown people, Brown/Spanish-speaking citizens and immigrants, Muslims, Sikhs, Jews, Women, & LGBT people to name a few.

This is the part of the blog where I wrap it up and call for action but all I’ve got is: White men, this is your fault. Figure out how to fix it.

As Black/Queer woman I’m not taking any responsibility for this problem or using any energy to try to fix it. I’m not coming across the aisle, sitting at the table or being nice to anyone who supports Donald Trump period. I’ve already used too much energy explaining it.

I tell you what I AM gonna do while yall figure it out though. Get a gun.

-C

 

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Commentary on Demetra Nyx & Alyssa Milano: White People Don’t Have Enough Problems.

White people don’t enough problems. As a result, they tend to create dangerous situations and faux-oppression for themselves.

A few weeks ago, my mother and I were on our way home. It was 10pm and cold outside. A white woman was running down the street, presumably for exercise. Of course, we had the ‘white people are white-people-ing’ conversation. Why in hell, are you running in the dark and cold? You’re less than a mile away from a treadmill inside a well-lit gym, Karen.

During undergrad, I remember sitting in a meeting of a certain organization listening to a white woman proclaim how much she enjoyed her period. I thought to myself, hoping it didn’t show on my face, “you’re outta your white ass mind.” 

White people don’t have enough to do.
White people don’t enough problems. As a result, they tend to create dangerous situations and faux-oppression for themselves.

From climbing a mountain with no harness, to bungee jumping, surfing, hang gliding, to running outside in the dark and then crying on 20/20, white people obviously have an adrenaline deficiency they’re trying to fulfill. None of the above activities seem reasonable or fun to my Black ass. My experience is different though. I have no shortage of adrenaline. I know this whole thing could end any time if for no other reason I’m at the intersection of Black, Woman and Queer. I look at every cop with the knowledge he could kill me and get away with it. I look at every white woman wondering if she’s going to call the police on me for exhaling too loud. I have no shortage of fear and problems.

Since the tangerine tyrant won the Presidential election over HRC, social justice is now mainstream. It’s laughable to me as social justice has been at the forefront of my mind since The Jena 6. Activism is my goal and calling. I’m tired of seeing people hopping on the bandwagon for 15 minutes.
 
White people WANT to be oppressed so bad. I do not label myself a feminist in part because at its inception white women were just trying to make sure Black men didn’t have more rights than them. There were no Black women at Seneca Falls. White women remind me every election that feminism is not mine when they put their ‘I voted’ stickers on Susan B. Anthony’s grave. Fuck Susan B. Anthony.
 

 

At the time I’m writing this, I’m 2 months into a Facebook hiatus (for my mental health, weight loss goals and my dislike of people). I peak at Twitter every now and again. But after these posts, I’m considering going back to being blissfully unplugged. The two people in particular facilitating my complete exit from digital civilization are Demetra Nyx and Alyssa Milano.

Let’s talk about Demetra first to get it out of the way cause I’m grossed out. An article entitled ‘Feminist Smears Menstrual Blood on Her Face to Show Periods are Beautiful and Powerful’ scurried across my timeline. Demetra is a 26-year-old Los Angeles sex coach who said, “Sharing pictures of blood on my face and body was just an impulse – I was creating a series to help women connect with their menstrual cycle, and I thought it would be fun.”

Cut the shit, Demetra. Our periods are not fun or beautiful.

As someone with a period, I’m fully ‘connected’ to this 28-ish day cycle. Physically, mentally and emotionally for nearly two decades, I know exactly when and what’s going on concerning my cycle. There is no more intense connection then cramps, bleeding, an irrational chocolate craving, acne, fatigue and a hurricane of a mood. I deserve some type of monthly award for managing to not get pregnant every month instead of this shit.

I realize that not everybody’s period is as bad as mine but I think we do ourselves a disservice when we try to make this cycle something its not. Frankly, it sucks for a lot of women. It is not fun, it is anything but beautiful. We don’t frolic in Lilly fields wearing white pants giving thanks that we get to bleed for a week.

 
The 20 year old me felt very alienated sitting in that circle of white woman gushing over having a period. The (almost) 30 year old me is not going to fake the funk anymore. My period is not fun. It sucks. I do not have to enjoy everything. Somethings in life are bad. I will not want to share everything on Instagram and that’s OK.
 
We also need to address that ‘free bleeding’ (a hoax) , rubbing your Menstrual blood on your body and using it for paint is disgusting, unsanitary and blood STINKS when it hits the air. I’m no expert, but its leaving our bodies for a reason. It is a natural process, yes. Our bodies have many ways to eject what is no longer needed. That is no excuse to rub the results on your face. If we aren’t going to use tampons/cups/pads, what use do we have for band-aids and toilets? Why bathe at all?! Its all natural, ain’t it?
 
*shudder*
 
There IS a conversation that needs to be had around menstruation.
&
 
 

The second white woman we’re going to discuss is Alyssa Milano. This morning, I saw this tweet:

 
Gtfoh. You’re Alyssa fucking Milano. You are a rich, cishet white woman. 
 
I would be lying if I said I was surprised by Alyssa’s latest antics. Two years ago my auntie-in-my-mind Hannah Drake told Milano to stop her performative justice. It seems she still hasn’t learned.

Oppression and identities are not a trendy T-shirt, pink hat or, God forbid blood to put on when it’s convenient. The very fact that your brand of oppression can be taken off, proves that it is not oppression at all. We do not have the option or convenience of taking our identities off. This intersection of identities is not one that we can get on a plane, train or automobile to take a vacation from. Believe me, we would if we could.

In this social justice production, your role as a person of with a certain amount of privilege: a white person in this case is an important one. Justice does not happen without advocates. The progress we have made would not be possible without allies. There are people who will NEVER listen to someone like me. Those same people will definitely listen to the Alyssas and Demetras of the world if for no other reason for the fact that they are pretty white women. Unfortunately, more often than not, those people are the very ones with the power to change. I am not holding my breath waiting on Alyssa or Demetra to be allies or advocates though. Their actions have told me what their true goal is.

When Alyssa Milano claims identities that are not her own, when Demtra Nyx… gosh I can’t even say it… uses her menstrual blood as paint, they are doing NOTHING but centering themselves. They are not being revolutionary. They are not cultivating progressive conversations. They are not leading a movement. All they are doing is fighting battles that are only real in their mind and frankly stressing me the fuck out.

I’m offended and baffled by fake outrage and fabricated oppression in a world where there is plenty oppression and a myraid of REAL reasons to be outraged. I’m worried that Demetra’s antics will take attention off of the student whose male-teacher won’t let her go to the bathroom when she starts bleeding, or the inmate or homeless person that has to put their health in jeopardy by using toilet paper as make-shift tampons.

 
I’m worried that Alyssa Milano claiming she’s ‘trans’ will distract from the fact that transwomen of color have a life expectancy of 35, that when she says she’s a ‘person of color’ she’s taking attention from the fact that the cops who murdered Stephon Clark won’t even be charged.
 
Social justice is real. The fight is an uphill battle. We do not need the distractions. Alyssa and Demetra, get out of the way. Wipe your face off and rest those twitter fingers. You look silly.
 

And while your practicing your hush, here’s a Guide to Allyship.

Keep Pushin’

– CAGW

 

I was only going to see Madea because Tyler Perry is Black.

I was only going to see A Madea Family Funeral this weekend because Tyler Perry is Black.

I love movies. I love going to the movies. My senior year of high school, my friends and I would skip and watch movies all afternoon. Looking back, I should’ve avoided all this student loan debt and became a movie critic. I haven’t ruled it out.

As a card carrying member of the community, my favorite movie genre is Black. In the immortal words of Issa Rae, “I’m rooting for everybody Black.” I feel an obligation to support Black movies regardless. Recently I’ve found myself having the conversation with myself that Dre is having with his kids in this clip because I’ve realized going to see Black movies means I’ll either be traumatized or disappointed. (I REALLY want to see Captain Marvel this weekend. Samuel L. Jackson no longer counts though, he got that white dollar down.)

For example, when I finally mustered up the courage to watch Detroit, I had to pause the movie for a full blown panic attack. I was inconsolable during Fruitvale Station (even though I knew the story).  I was PISSED when I left the theater after Birth of a Nation. I cried in the car after 42 (I was also going through a break up, don’t judge me) and I completely lost it at the end of Hidden Figures. I am not one to display emotion easily. These movies were huge triggers. I’m WEARY.

I’m exhausted by Black movies.

My mom is my movie partner. She’s been recovering from surgery and we hadn’t been in a few months. Last week, we got started again with What Men Want. I liked it. Erykah Badu’s character was HILARIOUS.

Here’s the thing. The movies my mom is going to see are limited. She likes lite, fluffy movies. She won’t go see slasher/horror films. This weekend, I want to see Happy Death Day 2U and Greta. I’ve been wanting to see Prodigy but those are out of the question if I want my mom to go and my local friends are very limited. I don’t mind going alone sometimes. I went to see Cold Pursuit alone. I liked that one too. I know we mad at Liam, but I’m a sucker for a kill everybody movie.

Anyway, tasked with choosing a movie we’ll both go see, I ask her if she wants to go see A Madea Family Funeral. She side eyed me! Her only daughter! Looked at me like I was crazy!

“No, I’m not spending my money on anymore Madea movies. Only way I’m going to see that movie is if Tyler Perry buys my ticket…. and picks me up.”

 

I laughed for a whole 60 seconds. But I aint gonna lie. I was relieved.

I do not want to go see A Madea Family Funeral. I had only planned on it because Tyler Perry is Black and he’s the star, supporting characters, producer, and director of the movie.

(We should probably consider the fact he’s a bit narcissistic and that keeps him from making quality movies because he won’t hire good actors or a director but I digress.)

Madea movies are not good. Madea movies are bad. There I said it.

 

From the plot, to the dialogue. Madea movies leave a lot to be desired. But the quality of Madea movies aren’t the only problem. The characters are cringeworthy, especially in the company of white people.

My Blackness won’t allow me to laugh at Madea WITH white people. White people love Madea because she’s exactly who they think Black and Brown women are; big, obnoxious, violent, unattractive, temperamental and funny. Tyler Perry’s characters are the kind of Black people white people aren’t threatened by. That’s why they flock to his movies and not other Black movies. White people didn’t go see The Hate U Give and Moonlight (also cried during that one). They were tricked into seeing Get Out. White people didn’t go see ‘Black’ movies before Madea.

Even in Perry’s movies without Madea (Why Did I Get Married,The Family That Preys), he almost NEVER portrays Black women positively. Tyler loves putting damaged, bitter, psycho, insecure, ignorant Black women in his movies. I really think this nigga hates us sometimes.

Furthermore, I’m tired of homophobic nig… Black people being the first in line to see a man put on a dress for entertainment. Is “manhood under attack” or isn’t it? Is the “gay agenda” and the “feminization of Black men a threat to the Black family” or do we love Madea? You can’t have it both ways.

Billy Porter, Oscars 2019 Red Carpet

We cannot clutch our pearls at an openly gay man in a dress on the Oscar’s red carpet and then turn around and keep supporting “straight” men who make a caricature out of Black women. You’re not threatened by feminine men, you’re threatened by someone being comfortable in their sexuality.

Y’all are comfortable with Madea because you’ve fooled yourselves into thinking Tyler Perry is straight (ha!) and because Madea movies have Christian themes.
Let me say this out loud, cause yall ain’t gonna accuse me of anything… I don’t for one second think there’s ANY gay agenda or that the government makes Black men put on dresses to destroy families. Heterosexual people don’t need ANY help destroying the Black family. Y’all are doing a great job. (Like when y’all humiliate your children for Instagram likes and Facebook comments). I’m just pointing out your hypocrisy. Tyler Perry and Billy Porter are the LEAST of yall’s problem.

Anyway, I’ve long reconciled that the personal is always political and even when I just want to be entertained, I’m burdened with my conscious. My awareness won’t let me watch a bad, problematic movie with white people and homophobic Black ones. I try not to be too woke to have fun, but it happens. Not to mention that until I monetize it, movie going is not cheap.

So, I’m not going to see Madea this weekend because I don’t want to… and I’m STILL Black af.

-CAGW
Follow me on snapchat, twitter and instagram at @CarrieKeepPushn!

#BibleStudyReflections: How Jesus Addressed Sexism, Racism & Sin at the Well

For this reflection, we find ourselves in the Gospel of John 4.

Jesus and the disciples were on their way back to Galilee from Judea. On the way, they stopped in a village in Samaria. While the disciples went to go get food, Jesus rested at Jacobs Well (mentioned in Genesis 33, not the one in Texas).  It was around noon and a Samaritan woman had come to draw water. Jesus asked her for a drink.

Pause.

Jesus was a (BROWN NOT WHITE) Jew and this woman was a Samaritan. Because of racism, Jews didn’t have anything to do with Samaritans. Also, men did not converse with women without the presence of their husband (I wish that’s how it was today. LOL).

This conversation was no accident. Racial and gender lines were broken by Jesus even initiating this conversation. A Jewish man talking to a Samaritan woman was NOT the social norm. There are social norms I tolerate, there are even social norms I appreciate. I’m so glad that Jesus knew when to break the rules.

The woman said so too, vs. 9 says “You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. Why are you asking me for a drink?” 

Jesus replies in vs. 10 “If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me and I would give you living water.”

At this point, the woman (whose name we never know) and Jesus are talking about two different types of water. The woman was focused on the law. Jesus was focused on grace. Still focused on H2O, the woman tells Jesus he doesn’t have a rope or a bucket. So where are you going to get this water?

I enjoy how bold this woman is. He’s a Jew, she’s a Samaritan. He’s a man, she’s a woman. But she is still taking time to boldly question him. Sometimes as Christians, we are hesitant to question God. This woman is a great example of how bold we can be in our questions to Jesus. I’m so glad that he can and will answer our questions!

Jesus breaks it down. verse 13: “Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again…”

The woman asks for this water. She doesn’t want the water for spiritual reasons. She’s concerned about her physical thirst and her social status. She’s come to the well at noon. Nobody would come to the well at the hottest time of day, I imagine drawing water from a well is physically taxing. Since everybody came to the well at the same time. It was as social as it was practical. Why was this woman even at the well alone at noon?

To answer her question, Jesus tells her to ‘Go and get her husband.’
Me: “Now, Jesus. You know that woman ain’t got no husband.”

Jesus wasn’t being shady though. According to the law, men couldn’t converse with women in public without their husband. But also, He was (gently) addressing her sin. Jesus didn’t come up on the woman and say “YOU A HO!”. He approached the woman humbly. By asking her to draw water for him he made her useful. He made her seen. He asked her He started a conversation.

“I don’t have a husband.” (verse 16) the woman replied. Jesus says in verse 17, “You’re right, you don’t have a husband. For you have had five husbands and you aren’t married to the man you’re living with now.”

Me: Dag Jesus, you gon just call sis out like that?! I bet she was at the well cause she had slept with somebody’s man and the girls ain’t like her.

5 Husbands is a LOT. But when we look at the social context of the time, when a woman’s husband died, she became a beggar, a prostitute or somebody else’s wife. Since men dropped like flies due to war, famine and disease, sis just chose the best option. I’m so glad single is an option now. 

It was this moment that she realized she wasn’t just talking to a regular guy. She also got called out and changed the subject. LOL. vs. 19. You must be a prophet. 20 So tell me why is it that you Jews insist  Jerusalem is the only place of worship while we Samaritans claim it is here at Mt. Gerizim where our ancestors worshiped?

Jesus replies in verse 21-24. “… the time is coming when it will no longer matter whether you worship… on this mountain or in Jerusalem… salvation comes through the Jews. But the time is coming… when true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth”

If I was Jesus, I woulda been like “Girl, don’t try to change the subject!” But He answered and in His answer addressed racism and sin. Jews were the chosen people. The 12 Hebrew tribes were those saved from slavery in Egypt and recipients of the promised land. They also had very strict religious laws to follow to stay in good standing with God.

Jesus came to shake all that up. With his sacrifice, the veil in the temple was torn and now we ALL have access to God is thorough Jesus. Thank God, I don’t wanna slaughter no animals.

So how did Jesus address racism, sexism and most importantly sin? The Water.

He used the earthly relevance of the water to start a conversation across racial and gender lines, and show the woman that He had living water; that HE IS living water.

To evade Jesus even further, she says “I know the Messiah is coming… he will explain everything to us.” Jesus tells her, “I AM the Messiah!”

I think I would’ve been skeptical. The woman wasn’t though. She left her water, she didn’t grab no shoes or nothing and went back to her village telling everyone, “Come see a man who told me everything I ever did! Could he possibly be the Messiah?”

As a result of her testimony, many Samaritans in her city believed in Jesus. Somebody had to tell you about Jesus. Somebody’s salvation will come about from your testimony. So tell someone about your Jesus encounter. Also, I believe this story is a good argument for women preachers. But I’m not arguing with Baptist negros today.

Imagine going to run an errand and meeting Jesus. Where did you meet Jesus?

“There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus. And now that you belong to Christ, you are the true children of Abraham. You are his heirs, and God’s promise to Abraham belongs to you.” Galatians 3:28-29

Until next time, 
– Carrie

What’s wrong with white men?!

29138219_10214022411253215_1604364373_n“He was polite, a deep thinker…”
“… a very challenged young man”
“seemed like a smart kid who showed a lot of promise”
“he came from a tight-knit, godly family”

These quotes describe Mark Anthony Conditt, the 23 year old white guy who before blowing himself up carried out terrorist attacks via bombs in FedEx packages for the better part of a month in Austin, TX. These attacks resulted in the murders of Anthony House and Draylen Mason (both Black men) as well as the injuring others.

You’re familiar with the adage from James Baldwin “To be Negro in this country and … conscious is to be in a constant state of rage.” I don’t want to be in a constant state of rage and constantly try to avoid it by choosing my battles, but I’m going to have to choose this one. I hear the conversations around gun control, mental health and bullying but nobody is going to say it so I will.

White men are the problem.

In my Tonald Drump voice, we gotta figure out what the hell is wrong with white men?

Not only are white men the problem, the media constantly bends itself into a pretzel to humanize even the worst of them.

In the trend of white men going ape shit, the cops and politicians (IF they say anything) are always very careful to NOT say its terrorism or a hate crime. I call bullshit. The current cultural connotation of the word terrorism is brown and Muslim. According to the dictionary terrorism is violence in the pursuit of political aims.

2016’s  New York bomb was called terrorism. A Muslim with a name we can’t pronounce from a country we can’t point to on a map carried out an attack in the name of ISIS. We can all agree that’s terrorism and those with the microphones were quick to call it terrorism even BEFORE they had any evidence of it.

When I was reading the article about the latest white male terrorist, I thought I was reading the obituary of a victim and not the attacker. He was “polite”, “a deep thinker”, had “many challenges”. Why do those that control the narrative try so hard to humanize White men no matter what they do; while at the same time trying to harden and criminalize Black victims? White supremacy is the short answer.

The foundation of the United States of America is white supremacy. It was colonized by white men who carried out a genocide of brown and red people, then enslaved Black people to build it. America would not be what it is economically or culturally had it not been for white supremacy. Once America addresses and admits its original sin, she can begin to atone for it. Until then, we going straight to hell and I’m calling everyone out. You can’t whoop me.

I have it better than my ancestors and for that I’m thankful. I’ve never had to look for the colored section of anything but, white supremacy still affects us, its just a different flavor.

The 2018 version of white supremacy isn’t white robes and ropes hanging from trees, it’s the media painting Stephen Paddock who killed 50 people “enjoyed country music and lived a quiet life.”

It says of Nikolas Cruz who walked in his alma mater and shot 33 innocent people that he was ‘lost and lonely’

The guy that drove into a crowd of peaceful protesters? James Feilds, Jr. “had trouble making friends”, was a “very quiet little boy”.

180323143839-02-stephon-clark-family-exlarge-169On the other hand, Trayvon Martin a teenager murdered for no reason was called a ‘thug’ because he had on a hoodie on a cold rainy night.

2018’s white supremacy murders Jordan Davis because he was playing ‘thug music’ and then goes home and orders a pizza. It insists Eric Garner died of a heart attack after being choked to death and saying “I can’t breath.” 11 times. Stephon Clark was holding a fucking cell phone in his grandmomma’s back yard and shot at 20 times.

According to Vox, since ole boy took office, more Americans have been murdered by white men than by Muslim men. As a matter of fact, since 9/11, more Americans have been killed by homegrown right-wing terrorists than Muslim ones. I’m not denying that there are Muslim extremist groups that are a threat and we should probably keep one eye on them, but I am arguing that as American citizens we are more likely to be killed by a Christian white dude so we need to vet them too. But we know white supremacy isn’t rooted in logic.

In my opinion, we need to take a serious look at the psychology of the American white (straight, cis) white man and figure out why there is a different mass shooting/bombing every week. The rest of us do not go on killing sprees because of life’s circumstances. Did nobody teach white men to deal with inconvenience? We can talk about mental health and gun control, but we have to talk about white men if we want to stop mass shootings and bombings.

I’m mentally ill and that’s putting it nicely. I’m NUTS. I was bullied about my hair. My father couldn’t be bothered. I never felt an urge to kill a bunch of innocent strangers about it. I’m not saying I’d never shoot anybody, I’m just saying if I did, I’d have a reason. I’m trying to figure out what is it about the white male experience that makes him lose his marbles at experiences that are regular to the rest of us. Why kill a bunch of innocent strangers?

Furthermore, why don’t the people around him see that he’s a terrorist? There are people in my life that if they did something I’d be like “oh yea, they did that shit. guilty as hell. been crazy since they were born.” (I ain’t no snitch though) You mean to tell me that NOBODY around these terrorists saw it coming? There’s a FEW people in my life I make sure don’t have access to guns and explosives.

What if Black women went on killing sprees every time they were bullied?! What if Black women had time to make bombs?

In my humble opinion, I think that white men are used to being on top in every aspect of society. They are teaching their sons that they are special if for no other reasons than they are white men and the world is changing. We like to say that racism is over. But the guys that are carrying out these terrorist attacks are 20 something millennials whose parents been lying to them.

They must come to terms with being a white man isn’t enough anymore and that white mediocrity won’t always win. We had a Black president, a woman almost became one so they had to go get the poster child for white mediocrity and elect him. He’s racist, sexist, an all around buffoon and has emboldened mediocre white men everywhere. We in danger, yall.

In conclusion, I’m not a mental health expert… This is just my theory. I wish I could spend my energy on something else (listening to Snoop’s Gospel album) but I like going to church and the movies and don’t want to get shot. I live in Kentucky, issa lotta white men here. I got to be vigilant. A relative and I were at Hobby Lobby and this white man reaches into his coat (for what we later figured out were his car keys), and we paused and grabbed each other.

White men are the issue this time. I’ve had to take on alotta heavy loads for ALL Black women (and Black people at times) so I’m glad to give something to white men. White men are the issue. They are the domestic terrorists. They are the reason ole boy is in office. White men have a permanent spot on my prayer list.

#StopWhiteMen2018

If this blog entry upsets you, remember that you can’t whoop my ass and I only argue on Sundays. Wakanda Forever.

-CGW

Men Are Bitches.

I don’t usually post timely blogs cause I don’t want you all to get used to consistency and I want a timeless element to the blog. This one however wouldn’t leave me alone. Oh. Here’s a language disclaimer. I’m saved. I cuss.

According to dictionary.com,
Bitch [bich]: 1. female dog 2. a malicious, unpleasant or selfish person, especially a woman 3. to complain

The word bitch is usually reserved for women. Because of the hierarchy of feminine and masculine, no man wants to be called a bitch. I’m pretty sure the men reading are angry at me right now. A hit dog will holla. Lots of men (especially those cisgender and heterosexual) value their masculinity and ‘bitch’ is opposite of masculine. It’s cowardly, emotional, weak, soft, fragile. Men tell upset little boys “quit crying like a lil bitch!” I’m emasculating you by calling you a bitch, sir. I just want you to pay attention to what I’m saying. Society is largely patriarchal. Our political and corporate leaders, athletes, favorite artists a lot of times are men. I’m a cultural critic. I’m critiquing. Get into it.

I’m pretty logical. I know not all men are bitches. So, I’m going to be specific. Lets start at the top.

The President

We don’t speak his name. Kinda like Voldemort in Harry Potter. We call him ’45’ in my house. My president is Maxine Waters. VP is Beyonce. I said what I said.

I would argue that since the leader of the country is a bitch, the standard has been lowered. He’s still holding rallies after he won the whole election because he’s so insecure, he needs crowds of people to cheer for him to feel good about himself. It would be funny to watch if he wasn’t the chief diplomat. He’s a coward. He called an American citizen exercising his first amendment right a ‘son of a bitch’. He didn’t call white supremacists/neo nazis SOBS, the Taliban/Al-Qaeda (or whatever brown/Muslim people we fighting), Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong-Un, Hurricanes, or any true opponents SOBS. This bitch waited until he was in Alabama (not the HBCU part evidently) where he knew he would get applause to call athletes standing up for something righteous SOBs. Call Colin, LeBron, or Stephs SOBs to their face. He’s a political PickMe Penelope.

Bitch honorable mention: Congress for not impeaching him.

Piers Morgan

I woke up from a nap and Piers Morgan was trending but not dead. He tweeted this bull.

Using the N-word must give old white men erections. Piers’ bitch ass wanted to say ‘niggas’ so bad he brought up a 12 year old song. I promise a few rappers have used ‘nigga’ a few times since “Gold Digger”.  Piers used ‘nigga’ more than I do and I’m a nigga that says nigga all the time. Click on the picture to read the article. Piers is a respected journalist. He be on CNN and shit. Why is he constantly trolling black people to stay relevant? Doesn’t he know that #BlackTwitter does not posses the grace of Jesus?

White people. You don’t get to offer your opinion on the N-Word. I don’t get to offer my opinion on Lacrosse. I barely know what it is. Do you want to call me a nigga? Do you want to get hit in the mouth? Do not use it. Period. The whites are so used to having access to EVERYDAMN THING that they can’t wrap their minds around not having access to a word. One word.

Bitch honorable mention: Alpha Pi Sorority for rapping along and not omitting the N-word. That’s in the white fan of hip-hop handbook.

Another Bitch honorable mention: Niggas that don’t like being called niggas.

The NFL

Oh yall bitches wanna kneel and lock arms now? Some of yall bitches just gonna stay in the locker room? Football is an aggressive sport. They hit each other so hard their brains start deteriorating and they literally go CRAZY before 50 or earlier. But when it comes to injustice, they are rather docile. We are all too docile to injustice in my opinion. Colin Kaepernick was kneeling ALONE last year. “I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color. To me, this is bigger than football and it would be selfish on my part to look the other way. There are bodies in the street and people getting paid leave and getting away with murder.” 

Yall’s black asses are going to let a biracial guy raised by white people stand up taller than you for the rights of black people?!

I’m not impressed by players who chose to show solidarity for the first time. The conversation has now become about the President’s name calling, superficial/symbolic patriotism and not about victims of police brutality. Choosing to kneel for the first time yesterday shows that players were more offended by being called SOBs than state sponsored violence against black people. Only when their egos were bruised did those BITCHES decide to take action. They were standing up for Colin and for themselves. They were standing up against 45. Meanwhile, the 200+ black people that the police have killed since Kap first protested have been forgotten.

Check out the data on police shootings compiled by the Washington Post and The Guardian.

Bitch Honorable Mention: Niggas who won’t protest the NFL.

Dr. Boyce Watkins

I’m a fan of Doc. That doesn’t mean I always agree with him. On Saturday on Facebook he said “Toxic Feminism has done nearly as much harm to the black family as the KKK its self” NIGGA WHAT? That statement was like Hotep level 10. Don’t take a worthy conversation (Toxic Masculinity) and make it fit your agenda. Ole “I know you are but what am I” head ass. Feminism is the advocacy of women’s rights based on the equality of the sexes. We have a bad habit of blaming the woman always. Women do some crazy shit. I know. I am one. I’m nuts. But Dad/Husband/Baby Daddy left the family and Mom/Wife/Baby Momma stayed and raised all the kids and feminism destroyed the family? Not the bitch who made a family and then left.

Not to mention many black women don’t identify as feminists because feminism is VERY white.

I’d love to have a conversation with Doc about this. Maybe I shouldn’t have called him a bitch first. Ah well.

Bitch Honorable Mention: The Hoteps and PickMe Penelopes cosigning Doc in the comments.

—–

Thus is my argument of the bitch-ness of men. Don’t come in my inbox telling me why you aren’t a bitch (yes you are) or that not all men are bitches. If you want to have a meaningful conversation, I’m all for it. Also. if you’re chunky with a beard, a nose ring, love the Lord and want a nice wife to ruin your credit and tell you that you’re trash feel free to inbox as well.

Future Blogs
Wednesday: Millenials and The Church Part 2.
In the near future: Church Songs that are a Lie.

Thank you.

-CGW

What I #AINTGONDO

As humans, we all want to fit in or feel like we belong to something. There are many ways that we attempt to fit in, an activity, gang, church, fraternity, or interest in a TV show, music or fashion. Sometimes fitting in isn’t the answer.
As I get closer to “grown ass woman” status, there’s some stuff I AIN’T GON DO. Social media is good for showing trends, what’s in, the ‘new wave’ as the kids say. I looked at Pinterest for my haircut, Twitter/Youtube for news and Facebook for unhealthy debates on said news… for the culture, you know?
I could get with Dashikis, Scandal, the new black people album or movie but even i have my limits. As humans I believe we’re tempted to like or embrace something that everybody else has liked or embraced so we can fit in but fuck that. The masses do some stupid shit, look at elections. Its Planet of the Apes in Washington, DC cause most people ignant.
The problem with social media is everyone wants to seem better so niggas be like “I’m doing (or not doing) this thing and I’m better than you because of it.”
For example: “While yall watching Empire, I’m building one.” No you not. You work at Toyota and you on schedule Wednesday nights. Yeeen Lucious or Cookie, broke ass.
I had to compile this list for my mental health. I was born nuts. I must take part in the effort not to become more nuts. My momma told me ‘you can’t [always] do what everybody else is doing.’ I’m an expert at tuning her out but that was sound advice. The following is my list of what I #AINTGONDO.
1. Not wear a bra: I came across a post on Facebook of a nice young lady encouraging all of us with breasts to ‘take your bra off, save the money and be free’.  Look, if you got B cups or C cups you can’t give me advice on my bosom. I posted that and my homegirl commented “if I take my bra off, I’ll cause a black out.”
I be in the gym sweating my edges out to get to B cup status (30 lbs down bishes). Hopefully one day I can go braless but as long as I’m teetering betwixt DD and F they gon be strapped tf IN hear me? Your 5th grade ass tiddies don’t pull on your shoulders and back. You don’t wanna wear a bra? Prosper, my sista. As for me and my tiddies… and some of yall sistas that have threw your bras away need to go in the trash can and get ’em
2. Be vegan or vegetarian: ain’t a documentary I can watch that’ll make me not eat the wings off a chicken and sometimes I want a fish sammich. Kale doesn’t taste as good. You vegan with thigh high leather boots on. You ain’t doing no cows any favors. Have a burger. God gave Adam dominion over animals. He said let there be buffalo wings and they were good!
 3. Propose to a man: when it comes to romantic/sexual relationships I’m pretty liberal… i thought. I don’t want a public proposal at all and I’LL BE DAMN if I get on one knee. I’m the prize. I’d rather have a conversation like, ‘we getting married or nah?’ and go down to the court house. Men get on one knee, women get on two.
4. Have a gender reveal party: past year or so everybody done got knocked up. I love babies. i like kids better than adults.
Buuuuuut to me, gender reveal parties are narcissistic and kinda weird. Like, hey we had sex and made a baby. Come and see if the baby has a penis or vagina!
Plus there’s gonna be shower a few months later right? Am i supposed to get 2 gifts? cause I’m not.. then ANOTHER gift for the first birthday. this lil nigga still shits and slobbers on hisself. Why he need all these events? You’re not celebrating the baby, you’re celebrating yourself.
Yall having extravagant ass gender reveals and showers cause aint gon’ be no wedding. Its your prerogative. I’ll be at the house.
Not to mention technically, we know the biological sex of the baby and not necessarily the gender. But this ain’t science class. Use your googles.
5. Eat bacon or potato salad: like I said, we all want to fit in. Everybody loves bacon and niggas love potato salad (do white people eat potato salad?). Bacon and any part of a pig makes me sick and the texture of tayta salad.. I JUST CAINT.
6. Defending R. Kelly or Bill Cosby: There ain’t music or TV good enough to make me defend either one of them nasty muhfuckas and you’re trash if you defend them. tuh-rash. garbage. dumpster contents. We send a very clear message to black girls and young women who’ve been abused when we continue to defend predators. What if black women stopped defending you?
7. Watch Game of Thrones, Power or Queen Sugar: I just have too many shows distracting my life and I’m not adding anymore. Plus, why is everybody always arguing about Power and spoilers online? Quit spoiling the show for everybody, hell. I’m waiting for Empire, Star, Scandal and This is Us.
8. Explaining racism, sexism or any -phobia: People are ignorant and happy about it. I’m not going to spend time or energy explaining to a stranger why they should treat me and/or my loved ones as human. Be respectful or you can get the buy one hand and get two hands special for free.99. If you genuinely want to learn, I’ll educate for $20/hr. My cash app name is $CarrieAmanda
Be it resolved that the above items are what I #AINTGONDO I’m #ReclaimingMyTime. I encourage you all to make your list and share if you are so moved to do so. Forgive me for blogs that are few and far between. I’ve injured my wrist so typing is painful and my laptop has taken flight to the Holy City. Bare (or bear?) with me. Thank you so much for your support. Look out for the T-shirt line this fall!
-CGW